i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize