Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex