Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth

  (330): View more from Ohio

  well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth

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  (440): i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth (330): well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth http://tfl.nu/ms7e
  Replies (25) Good night (5149) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  He is an equal opportunity slut.

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  (816): He is an equal opportunity slut. http://tfl.nu/40gq
  Replies (10) Good night (2568) Bad night (772)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.

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  (336): Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh. http://tfl.nu/7dtp
  Replies (34) Good night (888) Bad night (3673)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song

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  (626): she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song http://tfl.nu/tlf6
  Replies (35) Good night (1699) Bad night (4430)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.

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  (206): I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed. http://tfl.nu/hhhb
  Replies (26) Good night (1101) Bad night (5761)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.

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  (631): just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high. http://tfl.nu/w9mm
  Replies (28) Good night (6281) Bad night (1005)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone

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  (609): I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone http://tfl.nu/cpqs
  Replies (5) Good night (1747) Bad night (969)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent

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  (775): Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent http://tfl.nu/ylaq
  Replies (6) Good night (714) Bad night (1273)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore

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  (775): She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore http://tfl.nu/r45j
  Replies (14) Good night (2924) Bad night (1085)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.

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  (937): as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over. http://tfl.nu/xpv9
  Replies (22) Good night (1782) Bad night (2288)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.

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  (804): We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt. http://tfl.nu/2b1c
  Replies (7) Good night (835) Bad night (1990)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.

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  (+44): My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste. http://tfl.nu/tlxh
  Replies (10) Good night (683) Bad night (965)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"

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  (703): Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up" http://tfl.nu/thd5
  Replies (3) Good night (1066) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something

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  (703): If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something http://tfl.nu/ij26
  Replies (1) Good night (422) Bad night (401)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.

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  (253): There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto. http://tfl.nu/3oah
  Replies (0) Good night (401) Bad night (232)

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