halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
