I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
