i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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