i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize