She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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