Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(219): View more from Indiana

I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours

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(602): View more from Arizona

You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.

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(914): View more from New York

just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(303): View more from Colorado

It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on

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(410): View more from Maryland

Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.

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