Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.

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(513): View more from Ohio

i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....

(508): View more from Massachusetts

Happy St. Patrick's Day.

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(214): View more from Texas

Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"

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(314): View more from Missouri

Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.

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(734): View more from Michigan

I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing

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(907): View more from Alaska

He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?

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