i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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