i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
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I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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