told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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