my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
