Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
The best walk of shames are on the highway
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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