once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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