And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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