What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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