This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may now shotgun with the bride
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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