I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize