Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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