you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I need moral support for this bender
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize