Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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