im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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