In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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