My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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