I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize