he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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