i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm bleeding and have questions
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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