when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize