Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.