I hope mine doesn't look like that
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That accounts for only three of the penises
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize