respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize