You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
