i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I met the friendliest cop last night
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis needs a shock collar
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
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