Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
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Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
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Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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