All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
