How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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