That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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