I can tuck mytits in my pants
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
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it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
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I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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