Plan B is the new Plan A
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
