so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize