Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize