I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
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will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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