i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
