nut hugger
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
