Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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