names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
