Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I love you. Go after that dick
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
