If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
