At least make sure they are 18
Why
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize
