I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
