If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
